Meet Trenchmouth Taggart, the oldest living man in West VIrginia, a man whose epic and absurd life story unfolds from the moment of his frozen-river baptism in 1903. Trenchmouth, nicknamed for his inexplicable, lifelong oral affliction, is orphaned and then raised by the Widow Dorsett, a strong mountain woman who teaches him to fend for himself. Trouble seems to follow Trenchmouth as he goes through his life with stints as a mine war sniper, musician, and prize-winning reporter. But Trenchmouth always finds a way to triumph, and when he enters his last stage of life, he is indeed a reporter worthy of a grand report, of telling his unthinkable tale. Yet it is in the telling itself that something truly remarkable is revealed, something even Trenchmouth could not have known.