Along with my own personal story, I am going to write down a few things that may amuse you (or even take you down some other emotional path) and I'll let you in on a few so-far-unrevealed aspects of my life.

I'm darn good at getting under other people's skin, but opening up about my own life is quite a different matter. So how shall I portray myself? There are choices, you know:

Wife, mother, psychologist, writer, comedian, actor, dancer, diver, gypsy, dreamer, rich girl, poor girl, beggar girl, thief. I am all of those and more.

Tell you what, you decide. You decide exactly what I am...

A complicated childhood in Australia, a bold move to London, being a woman in a man's world on Not the Nine O'Clock News, becoming Mrs Billy Connolly, motherhood, career changes and then Strictly Come Dancing - told in her own inimitable style, The Varnished Untruth is Pamela Stephenson's own story.