Ask most combat veterans to name the worst experience of their lives, and they’ll probably tell you it was war. But confusingly, if you ask them to choose the best experience of their life, they’ll usually say it was war, too. This is nearly impossible for someone who has not been in war to understand. Contrary to the steady stream of Wounded Warrior Foundation commercials on TV, combat veterans are not broken, and they are not victims. Pitying them belittles their experiences and misrepresents the challenges they face after military life. Combat veterans have experienced a spectrum of emotions whose breadth supersedes by a number you cannot imagine the emotional fluctuations of civilian life. That’s why it’s hard to care about normal things when you come back. Ask a combat veteran about this, it’s a common feeling.

What is it about war that soldiers miss? This is a question that every civilian should try to understand. This is a moving and insightful book, weaving stories from the flight deck of a U.S. aircraft carrier off Syria to climbing a forbidden Himalayan pass into Tibet to explain one of the most everlasting of human pursuits – war. It’s also about coming home and confronting another kind of struggle, which we all share – the search for happiness.

In this collection, Peterson writes of war from the perspective of both a combatant and a witness, taking the reader from combat missions over Afghanistan as an Air Force special operations pilot to the front lines against ISIS in Iraq, and the trenches and tank battles of the war in Ukraine. Interweaving his front-line reports with a narrative about his own transformation from a combat pilot to a war journalist, Peterson explores a timeless paradox – why does coming home from war feel like such a disappointment?